As I commenced to rise me from the lower chambers of the vessel, and reunite with Purpose in search of the fountain… and more chiefly that I may return my awareness to the realm of Truth, I found me barred down in this lower chamber.
I turned to Reason who had so fiercely fought me just moments hence. “Are we snared?”
“Not snared… we are hindered, though this hindrance may snare us if we be not precautious.”
“But wherein shall we take precaution?” I asked.
“You did set me to attack Leviathan’s shadow – a good course for in the depths of this place, the stone may grind us to powder; just as you realized in our skirmish.” Reason replied. “We must beware that we be rather broken upon the Stone than crushed beneath it.”
I recalled that as we fought, and I sought to retrieve comfort from the Words Eternal, I found that they rather battered and caused harm to me than assisted me in the struggle. But why? Was I not using them lawfully, and seeking the comfort of the Holy?
“Yes…” Reason replied to my thought, “but you sought the Words while staring into my gullet. I am all of mind, and intellect, and am insufficient in myself to expound the Words Eternal. By me you can but regard the natural surface of them. You know that it is written:
‘My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.’
“Yet I am only able to process YOUR thoughts; and you know that the Words Eternal are sealed so that no man can know them. The god of this age has blinded the mind of every man for he has the charge of all the lower, earthly realm. A vail lies over the hearts of all men when they receive Eternal Words, and only in Christ is that vail taken away. Not thus only in part, for this applies to every Word. Many think they are enlightened for receiving the Seed, though they have not applied the power of it to each, and every Eternal Word of the book. Yea, the letters of it become rather much more a snare to them who begin to think that since they have received the Seed, their intellect is sanctified sufficiently to interpret the Words Eternal. Though even fully sanctified, I am not sufficient for the Words Eternal, these each require supernatural enlivenment through the Seed deposit.
“Many believe that filling the intellect with knowledge is learning; but they are only filling the temporal appetites of their mind (for I am an element of your soul, not of your spirit), these be those who are: ‘Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of Truth.’”
As Reason thus described his work, and its insufficiency unto the eternal, I sought about me, for I know that the intellect is but one element in the soul; there was another element which I had not yet met here. “Reason, where is Emotion?” I asked him.
Reason’s face sombered; the expression that came over him looked very much like a child who was caught by a parent in some misbehavior. “Well… she sometimes comes up through me…”
I locked my eyes with the fox, “That is a non-answer. Where is she?”
Reason’s face dropped, and his ears drooped low – a dog striving to make himself small, he looked back at me timidly. “She… is in the brig.”
“Why is she in the brig, Reason?” My countenance grew sharp with him as I stared into his eyes.
Reason straightened himself up, again, ready for confrontation. “She’s… unpredictable. When the storm hit she was out of control, if we had let her go she would have taken us down. We had to stop her.”
“She’s better at dealing with people than we are.” I said to Reason, “You’re too sharp and vicious. She may have helped us.”
“You know that’s not true… not under those conditions. She would take my knowledge and destroy us with it. You know that, you helped me take her down.” Reason shook his head, “No… she’s too powerful… and when we let her free she only humiliates us. Let’s leave her bound, it’s better this way.”
“It may have been necessary for the time, I’ll grant you. But you know that in order to be whole, I must have all my parts working. We need her.”
“Is this about interpreting the Words Eternal? She is no better at understanding them than I, and more apt to be deceived without my discretion. Consider how many times she has led us to disillusionment.” Reason stalled. “She seeks to be in charge, but leads by manipulation.”
“Yes, I know it, we must keep her in check – and ever thou should be her master, but without her, where is our compassion?”
“I can deduce to whom we ought to show kindness.” Yes, Reason had long taken her place within me; truth be told, I prefer it that way.
“Take me to her.” I commanded.
Again Reason lowered his head in submission, nodding slightly as he did. “This way.”
He led me down a long dimly lit corridor whose floor slanted downward so that as we walked we were heading deeper, and deeper underground – for the corridor seemed to be a poorly crafted tunnel in the ground. As well as slanting the corridor also narrowed as we went until I had to hunch over to walk. We came to what appeared to be an abrupt end to the tunnel, and I wondered if Reason had led me to a dead end, but just before the wall there was a sharp left hand turn in the tunnel which could not be seen until one was immediately upon it.
Reason stooped to the ground to light an old oil wick lantern which sat on the floor at the turn. As he worked at lighting the lantern, I looked down the tunnel’s continuation – a steep flight of stairs leading further down… but I could only see the first few steps of the stairway because for the utter darkness below. Finally, Reason hoisted the burning lantern, which emitted dim red light. So weak was the light of the lantern and so peculiar its color that it seemed more to be casting a gloomy shadow than providing illumination; my eyes ached as they adjusted to it, its weak brilliance bathed the walls about us in an eerie red.
Sensing my apprehension, Reason hoisted the lantern between us (and how his features in the lanterns hue made him appear a savage ravening wolf with blood red eyes), “We don’t have to do this.” He said. “Let us go back up on deck.”
“No.” I said resolvedly. “Take me to her.”
Again Reason nodded reluctantly, then turned and began down the steep flight of stairs. “This way, then.” He said as though there was any other way could go.
I followed closely behind him, both because I needed his companionship, and that it was so dark in this place that if he went much beyond me, I would surely lose him even though he held the lantern. To keep my bearings in the darkness I reached a hand out to touch the wall, and found that at this depth the tunnel was bare – above the stairwell the hallway had at least been paneled, down here it was cold soil.
“How is this tunnel supported?” I asked, at which Reason gave a low chuckle.
“You’ve been buried alive before.” He said, referring to my baptism. Then he turned back and smiled a sly grin, “Don’t speak too loud, or it may happen again.”
The stairwell was long, and steep we travelled down it for quite a long time, cautiously, lest we slip and tumble for… perhaps miles – I could not discern how long. Sensing my wonder (and perhaps to fill the void with conversation), Reason said, “Its actually a mine-shaft of your soul; there are many of them. Oil, and diamonds are pressed in the depths. Other precious stones may be found down here as well. Its good to man the mine as much as you can in life; you can use any of the precious things you find down here during this life, as long as you earn their use and value lawfully. For most the precious things lie preparing all the course of life unknown to the world but will one day be exposed… never fully until the Resurrection when the soul is strip-mined for its last ounce of precious substance, and men receive their last reward.
“Be on your guard though,” he added further: “It was BUILT as a mine that the Father of Seeds may one day collect a harvest from the earth – but of course… dark things grow here too.”
Not only was it dark, but I suddenly realized it was also growing much colder. “How deep does this go?” I asked him.
“Deep enough to make earth pressed oil.” He said, ambiguously. Then said, “We’re nearly there.”
We came to the apparent bottom of the stairwell to a flat concrete landing; the walls also transitioned from bare earth to concrete; we walked on for some time in silence until Reason came to a large door – again on the left. “Tunnel continues from here, and goes deeper.” He then pounded several times on the large steel door, shouting through it: “Emmy! You have a visitor!” I heard scuffling inside, and Reason looked back at me, again with a wry smile: “Its best not to startle her, you never know what will happen.”
He then extracted a large iron key ring and picked through a number of keys before he found the one he was looking for. He slid the key into the lock, turned it, and slowly opened the door. “Emmy, your master’s here.”
As the door swung open I beheld a mediaeval stone cell with some straw for a bed in the right hand corner; in the center of the room was an empty platter and a small wood cup laying on its side. The only light was Reason’s red lantern; I stepped past him into the cell. In the left hand corner, a small curled up child in tattered rags.
I looked at Reason in disgust, “How could you…”
“Careful!” He interrupted, “Don’t take your eyes off her.”
I turned to look just in time to see her small pale figure running toward me at full sprint, a look of utter rage on her sickly face. I lofted my hands to intercept her, but she leapt at me with the full force of her sprint; she caught my arms which I’d intended to stop her, and literally climbed up them to my body, which she immediately began clawing and biting at. Changing tactics I tried to grab her, and pull her from me, but her grip was like steel, and her wiry frame broke free my grip and slipped through my hands each time I thought I had ahold of her. Her long nails sank into my flesh as she crawled her way around me like a squirrel running up and around a tree.
Finally Reason caught her by the hair at her scalp and ripped her from me; he pounded her face against the stone floor, and pressed his knee down on her spine to hold her in place. “I warned you.” He said simply as I stared on at them.
Losing no time once he had caught her back under his control, Reason dragged the girl by the hair of her head to a place by the right hand wall near the bed of straw where lay chains and manacles. Reason manacled Emotion about the wrists, ankles, and neck. “This is how I usually keep her.” He said, “Lest she take too much power. For as you can see, her ability to cling to you and render you ineffective are great.”
Yet thus perceiving her in this form, a filthy battered child pale and gaunt… surely she is not healthy. Were she appropriately nurtured, fed and cultured, she could surely be tamed and civil. I looked on at her whose eyes only a few moments ago were filled with violent rage, yet now subdued they widened in wary fear; she crouched on the floor before us beginning to tremble glancing back from one of us to the other like a cornered animal. Especially was she wary of Reason, her principal abuser. The look of horror increased until her body so shook with fear that the chains and manacles rattled loudly.
Yet then I beheld another unseen thing for I realized that Communication – the small brown creature I had met on the shore – stood between Reason and Emotion (he remained invisible, and I could see but his outline as a ghost rather than a tangible being) with his hands stretched from one to the other. With one hand on the head of Reason, and the other on the head of Emotion, Communication appeared to be lost in some deep meditation, by which I discerned he was acting as a conduit passing messages one to the other empathically.
“Reason,” I said, “What are you saying to her?”
Reason cast his hands up in frustration, “I have said nothing to her!” He declared defensively. “She hears all my thoughts, many of them terrify her. Shall I cease to be? For thinking is my principal object.” At this I realized that Communication stood always between these two, and great harm would be done should he be removed from his station.
“Why is she so afraid?” I asked him.
In a rather emotional response (surely on account of Communication’s bond) Reason shouted: “She’s afraid of EVERYTHING!” And in emphasis of the word ‘everything’ he kicked her hard in the side of the head sending her sprawling to the floor.
A sudden flash passed through Communication’s body from Emotion to Reason who dropped his head in shame at what he’d just done. Then lowered himself to all fours and crawled to her, then picking up her wounded head in his lap he began to stroke her hair tenderly.
I stared, a bit bewildered at the bizzarity of their relationship. Reason looked up into my eyes with a pained expression across his face, he confessed in a shaky voice: “She is my beloved wife.”
I was now more disgusted with Reason than I yet had been heretofore through all his cruelty to every part of my person, and was about to ask him how he could ever consider thus neglecting and abusing his own bride when instantly before my eyes she transformed into a great hairless beast. Reaching up she caught Reason by the throat – he yelped in pain – Emotion grew from the small frail girl she had been into such an enormous size that her bulk barely fit within the cell, she hoisted Reason to her mouth and bit down on his head, grinding it between her teeth until blood ran from it. She then cast him at the far wall, I heard a loud crack as he struck it, his comparatively small looking body flopped to the ground like a rag doll, looking as though all the bones in his body had broken.
Then turning her fury on me, Emotion swooped me up in the palm of her right hand (for now she was so large I fit like a toy in her palm), pulled open a spot in the floor, and cast me into a swirling vortex of despair.
My final thought as I passed into the darkness – ‘Perhaps she’s not better at dealing with people after all.’
[If you just found this, but enjoyed the post, this allegory starts here, and links to each successive post at the end. Thanks for reading!]